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Things written above a Urinal
Why are you reading this? The joke is in your hand.
Any arsehole can piss on the floor. Be a hero and sh** on the ceiling!
Now here I sit, broken hearted,
Paid my dime and only farted.
Some come here to sit and think
Some come here to ponder
I come here to sh** and stink and
Fart like f****** thunder
Scrawled in BIG ANGRY **RED** letters:
"I F***** your mother!!!"
neatly printed in small calm blue letters:
"Go home dad, you're drunk."
Here I sit broken-hearted,
tried to sh** but only farted
Later on I took a chance,
tried to fart and sh** my pants!!!
Here I sit
And contemplate.
Should I sh**,
Or masturbate?
On a condom vending machine: "This gum tastes like rubber!"
This toilet paper is like John Wayne: it's tough, it's rough... and it
doesn't take sh** from anyone.
Do not throw cigarette buts in this urinal: it makes them soggy and hard to light.
Here I sit in smelly vapor
I just ran out of toilet paper
I will not wait, I will not linger
Oh, what the hell, I'll use my finger.
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