Jokes - The Old Ones

 

 

 

 

DICTIONARY this is a genderized dictionary.

THINGY (thing-ee) n.

female: Any part under a car's bonnet.

male : The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

LESBIAN (lez-bee-an) n.

female: A woman who makes love to other women.

male : A woman who has sex with other women so men can watch.

VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.

female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.

male : Playing cricket without a box.

REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.

female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.

male : A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2 minutes.

COMMUNICATION (ko-muu-ni-kay-shon) n.

female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.

male : Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the lads.

BUM (bum) n.

female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes look bigger.

male : The organ for mooning (and farting).

COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.

female: A desire to get married and raise a family.

male : Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.

female: A good movie, concert, play or book.

male : Sex

RECREATION (rek-ree-ay-shon) n.

female: A walk along the beach, reading a mag, playing a sport in a non-competitive manner.

male : Sex

FLATULENCE (flat-chu-lens) n.

female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion.

male : An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.

MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.

female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.

male : What women do while the man is shagging.

DATING (day-ting) adj.

female: Act of meeting a prospective partner, opportunity to learn about each other's hopes and aspirations, needs and wants.

male: Foreplay

FOREPLAY (for-play) n.

female: Pre-requisite to sexual intimacy. Period of arousal prior to full intercourse.

male: fore what?